Ready or Not

It's been a full week. Even when I had intentions of saying something, anything, I did not. I feel like I'm settling into the calm before the storm. Because, trust me, I know it's coming.

Some things I've been thinking about lately:

Like, wondering if I'll ever have a good apple ever again. Because I'm seriously beginning to doubt it. Apples in Texas are tasteless compared to the off-the-tree, unheard of varieties I grew accustom to. Having said that, I've had some amazing cantaloupe already this season (not local, but from the Texas valley). So, there is that I guess. I've been a fruit mood; blueberries, grapefruits, watermelon. Apples- all too often fail to perform.

As of yesterday I think I finally nailed down a stroller and a car seat. And, I've narrowed in a certain brand of cloth diapers. I know you were concerned... This, in order to divert my mind from thinking about decorating a baby room. I have decided I sort of need to embrace the fact that she is coming. She will be here in four months, and I sort of need to DO some things. It helped that my sister texted me last night asking about baby shower dates and place. "Great," I thought, "we have a hostess." So, there's that whole registering thing....

Maybe it's because I'm 33 and not 23. Or maybe it's because, I'm me. But frilly, lacy dresses and pink baby bedding and monogramed EVERYTHING, do nothing for me. Not to be unappreciative, but expensive, name-branded baby things are not first on my list. My babies room doesn't have a theme. It's just a room. With an old twin bed that was my great-grandfathers. A rocking-chair that my mom rocked me in, a small chest of drawers that was my fathers.... Nothing fancy. It does need some rearranging, a crib, and some things hanging on the wall. But we'll get there.

And we've settled in with some old names for our baby girl. Traditional names. With the ten names we have we are always rearranging them some sort of way. Dorothy. Camille. Elise. Eloise. Madeline. Margaret. Jane. June. Adelaide. Abigail.

Some of the names that either one or both of us liked early on that got scratched: Victoria. Fiona. Lydia. Olivia. Eliza. Rose. Genevieve. Naming a child is hard. I don't feel like I'll really be able to give her a name until she's born. That's just me.

I'm still feeling well, besides lower back pain that won't go away, despite walking daily in a humidity so high I can feel the air envelope me like a warm tortilla. ((GASP))... I stretch, I sleep correctly. I try to get up off my butt at work every once in awhile. My chiropractor says it's too early to be pregnancy back pain. Thanks... Next week is my 24 week appointment with my midwife, so I'll see if she has any insight.

It's so humid and hot a the real feel outside is closer to 97 degrees than the 87 degrees that it actually is. So, doubt I'll be doing much of anything this weekend besides eating sorbet and dreaming of floating in a swimming pool. It's First Monday time (already)... And it's Fiddler's Reunion in the town I grew up in. Both are outside events that mean more sweat underneath my boobs than I'd like. Did I really miss this heat? What was I thinking??