The weaker I get, the stronger I become. 2 Cor. 12:9

Just in case you missed it, this is my lovely henna belly at 38 1/2 weeks. I must tell you that I didn't pay for this lovely piece of belly art, but was put in contact with someone who is just starting out in the henna field. I was her first belly! Pretty good, right? She's in the process of opening up an actual location in Tyler, Texas and currently does face painting, makeup, etc. for parties, proms and birthdays. Anyway, I love it and I learned all about henna: what it is, how it works, that I can't get the skin wet for 24-32 hours....

I also WON a free maternity photo shoot, which I will be doing tomorrow, so that should be fun. Hopefully the henna stain on my belly with be dark enough and bold enough to makes for some lovely belly shots. If not, I can always keep my top on! I didn't really want maternity photos, but since they are FREE... And since I will probably treasure them in the years to come, then why not? We are set for a 20 minute mini session at 6:30pm as the sun goes down at the Rose Garden in Tyler.

Pregnancy and having a child has taught me so much, already, about letting go and releasing the worries and fears of all those things I can't control. All the "what if's" that keep popping up in my mind. There is no room for all those hypotheticals under the blanket of God's peace. My doula gave me a wonderful resource in a simple essay someone wrote titled "Scriptural Encouragement in Preparation for Birth." I've made several copies of the two page document (to have on hand at all times!) and often just sit in the baby room and read the scriptures aloud.

"Don't worry about anything; instead pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. THEN you will experience God's peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus." Phil. 4:6-7

"You will keep in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on you: because he trusts in you." Isaiah 26:3

"Keep your mind on Jesus and the peace that passes all understanding will guard your heart and mind in Christ Jesus." Phil 4:7

I continue to listen to my meditation CD with affirmations and guided imagery. I pick up my Hypnobabies and Supernatural Childbirth books and skim the chapters I've highlighted and marked. BUT, I think that the truth and foundation of God's word is what is going to be most easily recalled.

Estimated Due Date

I'm desperately trying to NOT become a calendar watcher, but it is so incredibly hard. I know that September 22nd is just an estimated due date. Baby girl could come any time in-between now and then, or I might still be pregnant on October 1st.  But it's hard when a friend had her twins last night. Two other friends, one here in Texas and another in NYC, are being induced today.... and still someone else I know (from high school, just a FB friend) is being induced on Friday. No inductions here, Chris and I tell my belly daily that we can't wait to meet her, but she can come whenever she's ready.

All in all, I must say I have enjoyed being pregnant. And for that I feel completely blessed. I have had no complications, complaints or problems and I know that is sort of unheard of. Now with only a week or so left, I can not wait to see this little girl. I feel big, like every square inch of space is being taken up by baby. She's always poking and jabbing and rolling around in there. It's so commonplace, but so mysterious all at once.

After the garage sale weekend- Labor Day, I feel like I'm ready. I have cleaned stuff out of the house. Chris and I continued to hang pictures in our bedroom this weekend and rearrange here and there; finishing up things we just haven't done since moving in.  (I'd still love to get our ever so comfortable king-sized mattress off the floor and onto a real bed frame, but that means I would want to buy a bed skirt. And a blanket that actually fits the bed. And a new comforter or quilt, so for now our time/ monies/ efforts remain focused elsewhere.) And, I'm okay with that.

I've made cinnamon, pumpkin and blueberry breads which are piled high in our freezer. I've made stews and veggies and chicken crockpot dishes which are stashed alongside the bread- for those days ahead. I'm continuing to stockpile crackers and pretzels and (now) fall candies that I'll want in eight weeks when the stores are almost sold out of candy corn M&M's or pumpkin Hershey's kisses, but I can't make it out to buy any!

I've got all the baby clothes washed and put away (up to six months, which I figure she'll be wearing in December). And I started writing in her baby book this weekend. My bag is packed for the birth center and Chris finally got to put the car seat in the car. I've added evening primrose oil to my herb/ vitamin regimen and I've amped up the red raspberry leaf tea intake. OCD much?? Oh, and those dates to help shorten labor, you better believe it. I carry a bag everywhere- plus leave some at work and at home.

I did replace my cloth diaper obsession with baby wearing. Although I did buy 5 more Bumgenius all-in-one used cloth diapers from a friend of a friend. Ten dollars each, how could I say "No?"

So, although I've been given/ allowed to borrow four various baby carrying devices I still want more!!!!! Actually, I plan on using the Moby quite often (which a friend loaned to us), and for many months to come. Reviewers just say it's pretty hot... Although it should be getting cooler around here soon, right?  The Ergo is the latest and greatest and can also be used up to 35/ 40lbs. Plus the child can be carried on the parent's back. This is the one I think Chris would enjoy/ feel comfortable with the most. AND, I found a sale and snatched up a $100+ Ergo for $70 online.

But now I want a ring sling. The fabrics are lovely. They speak to my inner hippy. They seem so easy to use and great for even a newborn. I really am considering this brand in the basic pure linen. I can not believe some of these ring slings sale for $200- $600 dollars!!! And no, I still don't have a stroller.

(Complete movie trailer. Chris and I love this movie.

Also, Maggie Gyllenhaal's character, good stuff)

I hope to post again before my life is changed completely. Sorry my blog has become all about baby, but I just can't get over her!

.... and counting

Baby Shower Number Two, First Baptist Church Ben Wheeler

Perfect size, handmade quilt. I LOVE this blanket.

Another handmade, tiny little jacket

Super frilly dress from Grandma "D" (which is what Chris' mom

wants to be called)

Chris' mom, Chris grandmother, me and my mama

 

 

I share these pictures because one, reading all these words sometimes, without pictures, is boring ( I know this....) and two, I know you want to know what's going on in my world. At least, I guess you sort of do, or you wouldn't be checking in on me here. BUT, I am seriously feeling huge these days. And I wish I was one of those "it's all belly" kind of gals, but I've gained weight everywhere. From my baby toe to my triple chins. Bah, I'm really trying to work past the point of not looking like myself these days, but it's hard.

 

It's taken me nine months to but on these almost 40 pounds and I'm wondering if it'll take nine months to get it all off. Plus the additional ten pounds that I weighed when I got pregnant.... Um, that's fifty pounds and it sounds like a lot.

 

...

 

In other not so whiney, self-deprecating news, my sister has convinced me to have a garage sale this weekend, SO... of course at 37 weeks pregnant that's what I'm doing. On Labor Day weekend. She's helping me. And my mom is helping me. And I recruited a sophomore from the youth group at church to help me. So, I'm hoping for a smooth day. Yes, one day is all I can handle. I'm not doing an all weekend sale. We have an entire room packed with furniture and boxes and stuff to sort through, which is why I'm taking off work Friday: to sort and price with my sister. Hopefully, this won't take all day long because I'd like to organize, sort and put away more baby things. Hang some stuff. Rearrange. Again...

 

So, that's what's upcoming.

 

This last weekend, however, was just as cram-packed. I can honestly say, going to work is sort of a relief from it all! At home I'm constantly cleaning, washing, preparing, cooking meals to freeze and running to and fro.

 

Saturday was my baby shower at church. We are so blessed and this little girl is already so loved. Chris said our living room looked like Babies-R-Us exploded. I just have to find a place to put it all!!  I am grateful, but it's overwhelming. Diapers and wipes are stacked to the ceiling. And, while it is my current plan to cloth diaper most of the time, I know we'll need disposables every now and again, especially during those first two weeks. I'm not even going to try to cloth diaper a newborn. Plus I hear that early poop is disgusting!!!!!!!!!

 

Add the shower gifts to the boxes and bags of things my mom brought over for the garage sale and viola, we could open our very own thrift shop. Additionally adding to the "this is just life" feeling is the fact that our pastor and his family are leaving our church and moving to pastor a church in San Angelo, Texas. September 1st is their last Sunday. And of course we wanted their chest-of-drawers (cause you know we didn't have one) and of course we wanted the day bed their daughter decided to leave behind. You know, I just liked it better than the one we had already taken out of storage and hauled to our house from my mom and dad's...

 

Yesterday, Chris and I led worship, where I found it terribly hard to sustain any note longer than a half note. My breath support was minimal and I struggled to stay on top of each word- spitting them out, before gasping for another breath. I think I'm done for now with that whole singing thing. I have to get control of my lungs and diaphragm back! After church we rushed to our final birthing class at the birth center. This session was on everything AFTER baby is here.

 

Daily, as I scratch things off my "to-do list" I add three more. I am trying to have our house completely stocked for those first few weeks when I don't leave and don't want to explain to Chris what shampoo I'm needing or where to buy my face lotion. I'm buying more toilet paper, paper plates, contact solution, hand soap and laundry detergent than I ever have in my life. I'm trying to have all those "just in case" things on hand as well: herbs, supplements, ice packs....

...

 

Tomorrow night is our final session with our doula and Wednesday our weekly midwife appointments begin. Not much longer now!