Love God. Love my Neighbor. Period.

My time alone has whizzed by. Chris has been gone since July 5th, and I feel like I have been careless and wasteful with all the hours that I've had between then and now. Sister, followed by sister, followed by unexpected house guest. Working and book study and summer engagements-- the days have been full of activity. Not that I am complaining about the amazing experiences or discoveries I've had this summer, I am just fearful that I didn't get done what I started out to achieve.

Then again, I think in and through it all, perhaps I did. Doing something wasn't what I wanted to do at all. I wanted to learn. I wanted to see what I could see if I'd just look. Instinctively I am thrilled at checking things off a list and getting things "taken care of." But I think this summer, God just wanted me to be still and experience Him through life and living and not in some mental or brainy way. There is a time and place for studies and retreats and binders, but I think God just wanted me to live and see Him in everything. He wanted me to know and believe that I live and breathe and exist to point directly to Him.

So now, everyone is gone, the part-time summer job is over, Wednesday is the last day of my book study and Chris will be home in the next 48 hours perhaps. I pray I was open to receive. I hope that I am willing to run with reckless abandon into the next season of my soul. What will I bring as an offering- a sacrifice- a gift? Will I lay it down and leave it there, knowing that my God is a loving God and that He longs to give me the desires of my heart?

"The main thing separating you from God is not sin if you are amiable with words. Repentance for wrongdoing is just one more thing to do. " Tim Keller. The key to renewal is not repentance for sin, but repenting where I find myself doing it good enough. Where I don't think I need God anymore. Where I think I've got leverage on God. Being right with God must become more important than being right - even if I think other peoples ways, motives, and ideas are not good or genuine or sincere. God didn't ask me for my opinion. I am just called to be a follower of Jesus Christ.